i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
