Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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