I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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