I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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