So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
