the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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