so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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