Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
