I wish I only lived at night.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
