i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
