I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize