You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
