i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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