a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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