The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
