what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Randomize
