I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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