we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize