Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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