I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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