a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
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