Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize