Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
