After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
he was CRYING into my vagina
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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