She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
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