You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Randomize
