Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
