one might say we're banned from that church
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
