Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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