I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
