Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
As shirtless as possible
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
They are going to name an STD after you.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
