Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
