dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
