i think i have herpe
just one?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
