I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Randomize