so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
