i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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