So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
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