kristin has been a bad kristin
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
