you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
