No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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