why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
