Please, let me fuck your mom
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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