You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
