Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
