remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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