I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
