rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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