I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
