the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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